Thanksgiving Weather Report

Posted by Michael on November 24th, 2005 filed in Fun Stuff

Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190°F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder. During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of 1 to 2 inches on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway.

During the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low of 34°F in the refrigerator.

Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.

Have a great Thanksgiving, giving thanks to the Lord for all He has done!

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4 Responses to “Thanksgiving Weather Report”

  1. Jo Says:

    Are you trying to say it’s going to be fowl weather today?

  2. Michael Says:

    The fowl weather makes my nose all stuffing.

  3. Jo Says:

    Well, then I guess we’d best be dressing for the weather.

  4. Stephen Says:

    :roll:
    feather weights in the art of puns.
    weather you like it or not, I can drum up some too.

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