Barbie Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken Doll

No, really. I thought it was a joke. Which demographic is Mattel appealing to? Who wants to play with a Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken Doll?

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In the Trunk

I hear a bad joke this weekend. Put your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car. Drive around town for a couple of hours. Now, stop and open the trunk. Which one do you think is happy to see you?

I’d credit that joke to the appropriate sourse; I think it was on Prairie Hom Companion this weekend. At first, I thought it was one of those inappropriately funny jokes, where only a few people laugh.

But it crossed my mind a couple of times since then. When it comes to biblical forgiveness, what message does this joke have for you? Hoave you ever been put “in the trunk” or put someone else there? How does one move past such an event without active forgiveness?

I’d like to hear your thoughts on this.

The Leader

Margaret Feingold, author of the Organic God, dropped a short note on her Facebook account today. It’s an old joke –

S. I. McMillen, in his book None of These Diseases, tells a story of a young woman who wanted to go to college, but her heart sank when she read the question on the application blank that asked, “Are you a leader?”

Being both honest and conscientious, she wrote, “No,” and returned the application, expecting the worst. To her surprise, she received this letter from the college:

“Dear Applicant: A study of the application forms reveals that this year our college will have 1,452 new leaders. We are accepting you because we feel it is imperative that they have at least one follower.”

Got me to thinking about what exactly a leader is. In the case of the university story, everybody says they’re a leader because it’s a requirement for admission. In reality, few people show true leadership: have a vision, communicate it, implement it.

Reminds of of one of my very favorite poems (and that says a lot since I don’t particularly care for poems), “The Leader” by Roger McGough:

The Leader

I wanna be the leader
I wanna be the leader

Can I be the leader?
Can I? I can?
Promise? Promise?

Yippee I’m the leader
I’m the leader

OK what shall we do?

Flip-Flop Again

I haven’t looked into the 2008 Presidential season yet, it’s too early. Hillary makes me shudder, Obama doesn’t have any experience, and no republicans have really stepped forward.

Afterwards, while answering a question from a viewer on the program YOUR SHOW about why he chose not to run, Kerry said he had decided it wasn’t the right time.

“Could that change?” Kerry said. “It might. It may change over years. It may change over months. I can’t tell you, but I’ve said very clearly I don’t consider myself out of it forever.”

But today, John Kerry, who earlier ruled out a Presidential run, this weekend said he might change his mind. That’s too funny. Can you imagine all the “I decided not to run for President before I decided to run for President” jokes? I can’t imagine Kerry capturing the hearts of the Democrats who will see his reputation for flip-flopping on issues and previous Presidential loss as a liability. And then to “flip-flop” or waffle on whether even to run for President? That’s just going to be fun fodder for his opponents.

Help Us Jon Cary We R Stuk in Irak

Cary Help us in Irak

Yup, that just about killed John Kerry’s chances of being President in 2008. First he insulted the troops, saying that if you’re stupid you get stuck in Iraq. Then, instead of apologizing, he went on the offensize and blamed Bush, even though Bush had nothing to do with Kerry’s statement. Then Kerry claimed it was a botched joke (which no doubt is Bush’s fault, too).

So now Kerry can apologize ineffectively (ineffective because it’ll look like he was pressured into it), and it’ll be an apology that’ll impress nobody. Conservatives won’t care, liberals will think Kerry’s weak. Or he can not apologize in which case moderates will think Kerry is just rude and stupid. That pretty much dug his hole. If he runs for President in 2008, he won’t make it past the first 3 weeks of the primaries.

Update: John Kerry has apologized for this:

You know, education–if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.

As far as I know, he still hasn’t apologized for this fropm 1971:

They had personally raped, cut off ears, cut off heads, taped wires from portable telephones to human genitals and turned up the power, cut off limbs, blown up bodies, randomly shot at civilians, razed villages in fashion reminiscent of Genghis Khan, shot cattle and dogs for fun, poisoned food stocks, and generally ravaged the country side of South Vietnam in addition to the normal ravage of war, and the normal and very particular ravaging which is done by the applied bombing power of this country.

Pink Panther Returns

I wrote last month about how I’m having trouble enjoying Hollywood movies and critiqued the latest Pink Panther movie as an example. Needless sexual entendre and poorly implemented slapstick spoiled what could have been a funny movie.

The American Spectator today agrees:

In addition to that first tedious scene of Clouseau trying to park a ridiculously small Smart Car in a space big enough for a Humvee, the movie includes a lot of unnecessary references: Viagra jokes, allusions to Internet porn and sex, and a few extremely graphic — but fully clothed — sex antics. Despite these elements, the film is still rated a mere PG and, if the previews of animation films and ads for McDonald’s are any indication, it is being targeted at a very young audience, namely children ten and under. It’s an adult-themed film being sold to children, an indication of a substantial error in marketing and production.

The article is excellent and gives examples of how today’s sexual jokes are blatant and crude compared to the intellectual humor regarding sex in past Hollywood movies.

The new film will no doubt prove an “it’ll do” DVD rental or airplane movie; but the script, the lewd humor, and perhaps our own time, will never allow the actors to make a real Pink Panther movie: something witty, sexy, and extremely funny. Without at least two of these elements, a comedy can hardly been a box office success.

If you want to watch a Pink Panther film, skip the new one and buy or rent the originals. For those who appreciate the occasional cocktail, by all means sip away as you watch and laugh. These films, especially the earlier films, provided a way for adults to laugh at themselves. And if children happened to be watching, as was the case when I was growing up, the innuendos and humor convinces them all the more that adults are simply a strange breed and not nearly so reasonable as a child.

Are there any “adult” movies anymore that do not include gratuitous sex and/or violence scenes? Are there any movies at the theater today that are worth watching?